MY WEEKEND PLANS

I'm annoyed when people ask about my plans for the weekend. I'm sure my answer generally falls short of their expectations. This used to be my typical response.

I plan to get in some grocery shopping, polish my shoes, take a walk, do the laundry, make a few phone calls, catch up on my bills, and watch a little TV.

When I explained that I didn't have any real plans, they seemed disappointed. But that's all changed. Now when people ask about my weekend, I give them the crowd-pleasing version of Saturday and Sunday.

I plan to go mountain biking, ice climbing, sky diving, hang gliding, snow boarding, deep sea diving, do some wife swapping, and finish up with tightrope walking across a gaping chasm. How about you?

People walk away satisfied and impressed, knowing they're dealing with a bad ass who wrings out a weekend till there's nothing left.

@#$%*@
SEND TO FRIENDS WHOSE WEEKENDS COULD USE SOME EMBELLISHMENT.