Friday, August 15, 2008

SUITS THAT DON"T FIT


I'm sick of greedy pricks that sue for moronic reasons and get away with it. Apparently ethics and common sense are on the way out. Victim status is a hot button and oily lawyers are cashing in on it.

A New York man was mutilated when he jumped in front of a subway train. He sued and got $650,000 because the train that he jumped in front of couldn't stop in time.

And why do juries hand out millions of dollars to litigious creeps who smoke 4 packs of cigarettes a day for 30 years, get lung cancer, and then sue the tobacco company?

Now I hate tobacco companies just as much as the next guy. But whatever happened to personal responsibility for committing stupid acts on a daily basis? Wait, I'm just getting started.


Two burly gentlemen (read two boobs) strapped refrigerators to their backs and then lumbered along in an ungainly manner to see who was the fastest. One of the boobs, who injured his lower back, sued the refrigerator maker.

His lawyer argued that the warranty said nothing about racing down the street with a refrigerator.


An enterprising young thief from Los Angeles sued the driver of a Honda Accord for running over his hand. He received $74,000 and medical expenses. The young man claimed he never noticed there was someone sitting in the driver's seat when he was attempting to remove the hubcaps.

A woman from Texas sued a furniture store after breaking her ankle. It seems she tripped over a bratty youngster running around wildly inside the store. Even though the child was her son, she was awarded $780,000 for her pain and suffering.

Any decent instincts to remain responsible for our own deeds are being trampled by those who accept no responsibility whatsoever. Where are those crazy villagers with torches when you need them?

@#$%*@

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wonderful.
Mister Thistle's epistles are like missiles!

K.M. George said...

I can honestly say, these people are idiots, and despicable... Nice guys never seem to finish first when it comes to money, only the morons!