Wednesday, January 6, 2010

GET ON FACEBOOK AND SHARE POINTLESS DRIVEL

Yolanda has a pimple on her nose … Ed's knees aren't what they used to be … Meg takes long walks when she's upset ...Clyde's favorite day is Wednesday … Mavis prefers her eggs fried … Larry is learning to juggle ...Naomi is now a brunette … Archibald is upset with his name ...Eunice waited an hour for a bus … Ron couldn't get a song out of his head … Shelly had 2 glazed donuts for breakfast ...Ernie waxed his floor… Cynthia is happiest when it rains ...Wally got a new dog … Caitlin banged her big toe again ...Orville likes purple shoes.

Instead of the usual meaningless babble, it would be inspiring if more Facebook people discussed things like underwear bombers and the momentous problems of airport security ...the absurdity of terrorist trials taking place in New York City, just blocks away from ground zero … the FBI and the CIA, who apparently lack the skill to connect dots, putting us all at risk by refusing to share critical information … and believe it or not, there's no tipping in Japan, yet the service is excellent.

If this is a bit weighty for Facebook, there are simple ways to lighten things up.

How about this, for example? Warren Beatty slept with 12,775 women. Did he keep count with a clicker? You could get a hernia just lifting his little black book. And why would Annette Bening think she could change such a stud muffin?

I mean, Warren is certainly no Wilt Chamberlain, who claimed to have bedded 20,000 ladies and still found time to play professional basketball. But these are impressive numbers.

And finally, a question that begs discussion. Does all this diminish the recent achievements of Tiger Woods?

@#$%&@

1 comment:

Howard Portnoy said...

Nice job, Milt. Funny.

--Kilroy (was here)