Friday, May 23, 2008


I hate getting emails from people living in places like Nigeria and Malaysia that just can't wait to make me rich.

My latest "tale of opulence" was written by a woman suffering from some kind of cancerous ailment who had only 3 months to live.

Her husband, who invested wisely in the capital market, had just died from a protracted illness. His lifetime dream –which will now be shattered if she can't find a dumb bunny to bail her out – was to leave his $10 million to widows and orphans and the financially destitute.

I believe their 5 children all perished when their school bus crashed through a fence at high speed and went over a cliff.

To nail down all the bases, she briefly mentioned that both her family and her husband's family were wealthy, undeserving, and cared little about uplifting the downtrodden.

Apparently I am her last chance to help the afflicted and oppressed.

Her money is safely deposited in a Security Firm in Malaysia. All I have to do is contact her and work out the details. Then she ended her plea with warm regards and hoped that the spirit of trust and love and generosity would stay with me throughout my days.

I couldn't help but wonder if these are the same people who sell those enhancement pills that are guaranteed to add inches to my penis.




daylia said...

dear mr thistle,
you are correct again.
only the originators of these email spams are the ones getting rich in their schemes, not the recipients.
the correct angry response is "DELETE AND DELETE AND DELETE!!!!

i'm a female and receive those same
motivational emails for my penis too. huh? i guess that these emails are definitely "personalized" and know us well.
thank you, mr thistle, you angry angry man
grrr %$#@

Anonymous said...

I agree.

CopyKatGirl said...

Dear Mr Thistle:

What really annoys me are the spammers that send personal sounding messages such as: "Saw your resume" or "Got your message"....I waste so much time opening and starting to read those before I realize it's pure junk! Grrrrr. By the way....there are actually people who BELIEVE those "please help me launder my money" email scams. If you want to send a wire transfer now, most banks now have pre-qualifying questions to help protect people from sending money to strangers! Sad.